I’m happy to have Tio Wally (long-time Me So Hungry reader) aboard to send in his eating adventures from across America. Here he is in Hesperia, California.

Greetings from Hesperia, California
N 34° 25.657’ W 117° 22.561’ Elev. 3,489 ft.

I’ve always liked Quiznos. They make a lot of really great sandwiches, my favorite being the Turkey Bacon Guacamole. It was also the first sub shop where toasting the sandwiches was de rigueur, part of its cachet, its claim to fame. Moreover, they are always pretty consistently high quality.

I always chuckle when I think of the fact that Quiznos has cost Subway, the sub shop that still hasn’t figured out how to make a decent sandwich, a fortune by forcing the low-budget, sub-par sub shop to buy a bunch of toaster ovens. It hasn’t helped them improve the sandwiches, of course, but it sure as hell slowed things down in a hurry.

Being unquestionably objective and unduly unbiased, I have to make an uncharacteristically astute observation here: Subway has become as ubiquitous as McDouche’s. And since its founding in 1965 it has yet to produce a single decent sandwich. Not one. That’s quite a remarkable accomplishment. I guess this somehow helps explain why I have a Pavlovian response every time I see Subway’s “Subway Subway Subway” logo on those blue exit information signs I mutter aloud “Sucks Sucks Sucks.” Moving on ….

Lately the “Mmmmm .. TOASTY®” sub shop has been running a “for a limited time” promotion introducing its new Pulled Pork sandwiches, selling a small sandwich for $2.99. In another effort to fulfill my life-goal of an All Pork Diet I figured I’d give them a try.

Quiznos is offering two different versions of the sandwiches: A Southern Pulled Pork and a Spicy Pulled Pork. The Southern BBQ Pulled Pork just comes with cole slaw and their “Signature” BBQ sauce. The Spicy BBQ Pulled Pork however comes with bacon, cheddar cheese, cilantro-jalapeño cole slaw, and BBQ sauce. They usually serve the Spicy on jalapeño cheddar bread but I got it on wheat. Had I known at the time that it’s normally made with jalapeño cheddar bread I would have gotten it.

Right out of the gate there are a couple of problems with the sandwiches. First off the pork is kind of a mix of pulled and chopped. Secondly it’s too skimpy on the meat. I don’t know how many eighth-ounces of meat is on the sandwich but it isn’t enough. Everybody knows that if you’re eating a pulled pork sandwich and you’re not dropping meat everywhere there isn’t enough meat on it. C’mon, Quiznos, don’t use a gram scale to weigh meat for a pulled pork sandwich.

The Southern version was just strange. The cole slaw on it had a weird vinegary taste. I thought it would’ve been sweet slaw like they use everywhere else. But no. I ate about half of it and had to toss it. Although the meat and sauce is passable, the slaw just made it too weird. Then again, maybe it was just bad slaw; I bought the sandwiches at different locations.

The Spicy one on the other hand was actually quite good. I was kind of suspicious at first because it seemed like it was going to be a real collision of flavors. I was surprised that the combination works pretty well together. It’s not really spicy though. I guess I expected it to have sort of a kick. And while the cole slaw was delightfully crunchy it didn’t really taste of either cilantro or jalapeño. Still, if it had a little more meat on it it would be a pretty good $3 sandwich.

As part of the promotion Quiznos gives you a scratch-off card with every sandwich. The valuable prizes you can “win” with a sandwich purchase are: a dollar off a regular or large sub; a regular fountain drink; chips and a regular fountain drink; or a cookie! Evidently I hit the jackpot as both of my tickets were for a dollar off. Woo hoo!! Now I can get a discount on a Turkey Bacon Guacamole.

And so we roll.

Quiznos Subs, nationwide

Tio Wally pilots the 75-foot, 40-ton(max) land yacht SS Me So Hungry. He reports on road food from around the country whenever parking and InterTube connections permit.

About The Author

Tio Wally

Tio Wally is pilot emeritus of the 75-foot, 40-ton land yacht SS Me So Hungry. Now a committed landlubber, he reports on food wherever he is whenever his fancy strikes.

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5 Responses

  1. Thistle

    Hello! I love reading your posts, but I haven’t commented before now. I’m surprised to see you like Quiznos! (Though I suspect Quiznos elsewhere in the country are better than the ones we have here, so it’s just mild surprise.) Around here (SF Bay Area of CA), you get ONE LAYER of sandwich meat on the sandwiches. So any cross-section bite would be thick bread, one slice of meat, toppings, thick bread. The sandwiches are bogglingly expensive, too — over $10 for a large, which is little but bread. (Yet wasn’t it Quiznos who was running the “don’t buy a breadwich” commercials?)

    When it comes to sandwiches, I go to non-chain shops whenever possible, and Togos for a chain place.

    Happy trucking! 🙂

    • tio wally

      Thanks for your kind comment.

      In truth, I hadn’t eaten at Quiznos for ages, mostly because they are rather expensive. And like I said, I usually always got the Turkey Bacon Guacamole. I always thought they were pretty reasonably priced considering. But not all Quiznoses are created equal. When I drove California all the time the only ones I’d go to were in Santa Nella and Westley as they were always a little more generous; probably because it was easier to be a little more generous than to argue with a tired, cranky-assed truck driver. (Please note that I say this about truck drivers only as an observation; I am always — ALWAYS! — the perfect model of gentlemanly decorum, damn it!)

      The great place for sandwiches, I’ve found, is Casey’s General Stores (https://www.mightysweet.com/mesohungry/2012/02/28/tio-wally-eats-america-caseys-general-store/). Unfortunately, they are only located in the Midwest. Unlike most sandwich places they make no attempt at portion control. I’ve actually walked out with foot-long sandwiches ($5.99) — “Put a little more meat on it.” — that contained well over a pound of they’re great roast beef. They also make a great Tuna Salad. But again, they don’t have them in the Bay Area.

      If you haven’t tried them already you might try Jersey Mike’s (https://www.mightysweet.com/mesohungry/2012/10/21/tio-wally-eats-america-jersey-mikes-subs/). It’s a chain but they make some pretty good stuff, especially the Pastrami, although it too is sort of pricey. They have locations in Mountain View, Santa Clara, Danville and Pleasanton.

      Again, thank you for your kind words. And thanks for reading … and commenting!

      • Thistle

        Thanks for the recommendation! I’ve never been to Jersey Mike’s before, but they’re so close I’ll happily check them out!

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